The Icarus Effect
November 15th 2006 05:00
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Although there are many gifted children who grow up to be happy and fulfilled adults, there are those who, despite their talents and intelligence, suffer from severe depression and are even suicidal. Perhaps this is because the people around that child failed to nurture him/her emotionally and just focused on developing his/her intellectual abilities.
This is what author Alissa Quart calls the Icarus Effect, feeling like a failure because you can't live up to other people's expectations.
As a parent of a gifted child I almost succumbed to society's influence. Luckily I was able to correct myself before I became too pushy or overbearing. For example this summer the instrument I wanted my daughter to learn was actually the piano and not the guitar. Obviously her heart was set to learning the guitar and so that's what I allowed her to do. Nowadays I take my cue from my daughter, I try to be careful not to push what i like on her but rather to allow her to discover what it is she would like to do or learn. As a result she is happier and blossoming into a well-adjusted child.
Here is a very interesting article on what might happen when parents push their children too hard. It cites such gifted children as Marla Olmstead whose paintings sold for $15,000 each when she was merely 4 years old. And Brandenn Bremmer who entered college when he was 10. Read it here and tell me what you think about this topic.
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